Even if the conversation is uncomfortable, talking is better than doing nothing at all.
By Laura Higgins, Director of Community Safety and Digital Civility at Roblox
As parents, we want to protect and shield our kids from all the things in the world that are scary, confusing, or sad. The fact is that by setting this expectation for ourselves, we’re setting ourselves (and our kids) up for failure. There will come a time, whether in the real world or a virtual one, where they will face a challenge that we can’t control.
As a society, we’ve reluctantly accepted this fact in the physical world. It’s why we equip our kids with the lessons our parents taught us: be cautious with strangers, look both ways crossing the street, don’t do drugs, car surfing is a really bad idea, etc. We foster critical thinking skills, we build resilience and confidence to empower them to make the right decisions and handle tough situations as they navigate the real world.
But our kids are growing up in a digital world, too, and to them, there is no divide between online and off. The internet is where they learn, create, explore, and connect with friends, but with all that comes some things less pleasant. There are real-life videos of violence. There is sexist, racist, or homophobic content. Porn isn’t just easily accessible, but shows up virtually everywhere.
So what can you do?
A report by South West Grid for Learning, an online safety advisor to governments around the world, concluded that we can’t solve this by “prohibition of access to this content,” but rather “through support and discussion, and the development of emotional intelligence and reliance.”
Much like the dreaded sex talk, not many of us parents are chomping at the bit to have these conversations. Plus, the internet is a vast and daunting place, particularly for those of us who didn’t grow up in the digital world.
But if we dig deep, just as our parents (awkwardly) did before us, we’re going to raise a generation of empowered digital citizens. Here are some tips on how to do that:
Finally, simply spend time with them online. Sure, they are not going to want you commenting on their social feeds or pushing parental paranoia into their digital space. But there are ways to join in on their digital world, and play is a great way to do it. What if you swapped traditional family board game time for a video game one evening? There are many multiplayer games you can play together — there are racing games and role playing games, etc. Don’t worry if you’re terrible — it gives your kids an opportunity to help teach you a few things about the digital world.
Laura Higgins currently serves as Director of Community Safety and Digital Civility at Roblox leading the company’s new digital civility initiative and providing the community with the skills needed to create positive online experiences. She has 20+ years of experience building and managing proven online safety projects and safeguarding initiatives.
Top image © Mediteraneo / Adobe Stock